


Star Treatment

by tsk



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Field Trip, Gen, Harry is only mentioned, Peter's SI field trip, Stark Industries, Stark Tower, could be read as Peter/Harry if you ship that, sorry about that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-02
Updated: 2018-09-02
Packaged: 2019-07-04 22:30:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15850722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsk/pseuds/tsk
Summary: Historically, Peter’s field trips have sorta been disasters.But he’s got a good feeling about this one.





	Star Treatment

**Author's Note:**

> What is with this trope? It's got such a hold on me!

  
“Why spiders though, why not lizards?” Ned waved his pencil, nearly hitting Peter. “They regenerate limbs, you know? Or octopi? Or scorpions? Or even a rhino?”

 

“Yeah, Lizard-Man just screams, ‘trust me,’ doesn’t it?” Peter joked.

 

“Parker, Leeds, eyes up front.”

 

“Sorry, Ms Warren!” the boys chorused.

 

Ned resumed the conversation later, as they packed up at the teacher’s instructions. “Hey, arachnophobia’s no joke. It takes one 'wall-crawler' headline and next thing you know, people will call you a vigilante. I’m just saying, imagine, like,” Ned paused, considering. “Doctor Octopus. Now *that* sounds like a nice guy.”

 

“Yeah, maybe. But then would I have to be underwater all the time?”

 

“Oh yeah, maybe. Oh man, we should check if you can produce venom through your spit or something. What if you kiss someone and then kill them accidentally?”

 

“…I don’t think that’s a thing.”

 

“I’m just saying, better to know beforehand. We could make an antidote lip balm for you or something.”

 

“Yeah, lip balm is really gonna help my rep around here.”

 

“Don’t diss self care, man–”

 

“Alright class, a notice before you’re done for the day,” Ms Warren called. She picked up a stack of papers from her desk and asked for them to be passed down.

 

‘SOPHOMORE CLASS FIELD TRIP’ screamed the paper. Peter cringed. School trips were…not so great for him. When they’d gone to Coney Island, he’d had a severe case of projectile vomiting and still had a visceral reaction to corndogs. The field trip to Oscorp had not exactly ended well. For him, for the spider, or for the company. Then, of course, he’d gotten trapped in that warehouse before the Decathlon.

 

"This is your permission slip for our field trip this semester. Attendance is not mandatory but it’s free, it’s in the city and it’s a good opportunity so I strongly advise…"

 

Peter tuned her out, heart beating fast as he read the notice. Stark Tower. That’s where they were going. He’d never been there, but he’d heard from Happy that the deal to sell it had been cancelled. This was amazing! He quickly sat up at the mention of his name.

 

“Sorry, Ms Warren?” he ventured.

 

His teacher sighed. “I was saying, Peter, that the first rule is _don’t leave the group_ , which means you specifically.” The class tittered. “You had to leave midway at Coney Island, you wandered off at Oscorp, you apparently 'got lost' in Washington DC, and you even disappeared at Homecoming,” Ms Warren said disapprovingly.

 

“Yes, ma’am. I mean no, ma’am. I mean I’ll stick to the group,” Peter grinned, and looked to Ned. Stark Tower!

 

Ned shared his excitement. “This is going to be epic!”

 

__

 

  
May wasn’t happy. “I dunno, Peter–”

 

“Please, May! Mr Stark won’t even be there, I asked him! And it’s part of school, I’m not going as Spider-Man.”

 

“You say that, but the minute you see anything happening from that tall tower, you’re gonna go off and superhero!”

 

Peter laughed. “Are we making ‘superhero’ a verb now? But come on, please? I doubt we’ll go past the 40th floor anyway, and all you can see in Manhattan is other buildings. There’s tight security around, too. Mr Stark won't let anything happen to me, or anyone else! So if you think about it, I'm safer there than anywhere else...” he trailed off.

 

“You’ve really never been there?” May sighed, putting her glasses on and reading the slip.

 

“No, I’ve only seen the Compound, and that was months ago! Pleeeeease?” he smiled winningly.

 

“No Spider-Man,” May warned.

 

“Come on, May,” Peter puffed up, “I turned down being an Avenger for you–”

 

“So you say!” May laughed, but she did end up signing the form.

  
__

 

Karen, on the other hand, was thrilled. “You’ll meet FRIDAY,” she gushed. “I am her imprint.”

 

“That’s so cool! Does she run the whole complex?” Peter asked, staring at the skyscraper and the accompanying South and North Buildings, which were just about visible from his vantage point.

 

“Only the tower. The other buildings have their own AI’s that report to her.”

 

“Do they have names too?”

 

“Yes, Miss Potts named them. Jasper runs North Building, and Jocasta runs South.”

  

“That’s amazing. So, like,” Peter hunched forward, swinging his legs, “are they your siblings?”

 

“You could say that,” Karen replied, after a short pause. Peter could be imagining it, but she seemed happy at the thought.

 

“Are there a lot of you guys?”

 

“JARVIS was the very first one, but he turned into the Vision. Then there’s VERONICA, who’s in charge of the Hulkbuster armour. HOMER runs the old mansion on Fifth Avenue…”

 

__ 

 

  
The day of the field trip took forever to arrive. In the meantime, Peter had been dodging questions from enthusiastic classmates about his internship.

 

“Have you ever met Tony Stark?”

 

“Wait, will Tony Stark _be there_?”

 

“Peter, can you ask him to get the Avengers with him?”

 

“Are you gonna be our tour guide?”

 

“Do you know any secret tunnels?”

 

“Come on, you guys,” Flash had scoffed. “Are we still on this? Parker," he had said, putting his arm around Peter, "people lie for attention, it’s okay. Just admit you were lying and let’s be done with it. I’ll give you a pass this time.”

 

Ned had 'accidentally' tripped Flash for that.

 

“Sorry, I’ve signed a non disclosure agreement,” had become Peter’s go-to explanation for everything. He hadn’t been asked to sign anything, of course, since his ‘internship’ had nothing to do with Stark Industries.

 

But his classmates didn’t know that.

 

__

 

  
Peter woke up with a smile. Despite his history with field trips, he was optimistic about the day. He wore his (ironed!) school t-shirt and his nicest shoes. He took extra care to comb his hair the way Ben had taught him. He remembered to take out any incriminating belongings out from his newest backpack for security check, as Happy had advised him to. He even left his suit out, with great reluctance. Happy had assured him that in case he needed it, Mr Stark had stored a new Spider suit at the tower that would be sent to him. Peter was so excited about this, he’d forgotten to ask for details. Besides, Mr Stark had sent a really cool smartwatch a few weeks ago, which could contain 100 meters worth of webbing for quick getaways, and didn’t set off any alarms if seen by laymen.

 

Peter was really hoping it wouldn’t come to that. He seemed to be gaining a reputation among his teachers.

 

He left extra early from home, grabbing a packet of treats. As he’d hoped, he met Lana on the way, who patiently let Peter play with her four dogs. Peter was still too embarrassed to talk to her beyond a hello; for the longest time she’d thought he was stalking her and had once nearly set her pitbull (Bruce) and her boyfriend (Ripper) on him.

 

Everyone was restless in the bus. Ms Warren was the only chaperone to accompany the class of twenty-five. Peter tried to calm himself down. _Please, no aliens, no spaceships, no evil villains, no petty villains, no radioactive insects, no monsters, no strange weather, no wizards. Nothing out of the ordinary, please,_  he prayed to any god that would listen. _Okay, maybe wizards would be cool._

 

Manhattan was a traffic nightmare and slowly, everyone's nervousness turned into boredom. Peter absently wondered how many people Mr Stark had had to bribe to raze the old building and build the Tower complex. He remembered Ben ranting about the Metlife building being shaved down to allow for the Stark Tower landing pad. Peter couldn’t fathom being rich enough to buy entire buildings, just to make way for private jets. They finally entered the tower complex over an hour after they’d left from school. They were met by a representative from the company who made them form a line to go through security. Once inside, Ms Warren asked them to wait quietly while she went to check them in.

 

“Your first time here?” said a voice to Peter’s right.

 

Peter jumped, startled. “Hey MJ,” he replied, clutching his backpack tighter. “Uh, yeah, yours too?”

 

“Nah, my uncle works in the North Building,” MJ replied, staring at the huge signboard welcoming them to Stark Industries. “I visited when the Avengers first moved in. I was really keen on Black Widow back then.”

 

“You’re not keen on her now?” Peter asked, thinking of the time he fought alongside her in Germany.

 

MJ looked at him sharply. “Her actions compromised the safety of several innocent undercover operatives, you know. The HYDRA files?” she clarified at Peter’s look of confusion. “Stark’s people covered that up, but the internet is forever. People died. Besides, she’s not even black. Younger me was really sad about that.”

 

“So…if she showed up here, you’d probably not even look at her, right?”

 

MJ stared at Peter in shock. “Do you _know_ her?”

 

“…I might have met her once or twice,” he shrugged, feigning disinterest. “Okay, once.”

 

“Shut up, you have not!”

 

“Where’s your journal, I’d like to make a quick sketch of your face right now,” Peter teased.

 

“Everyone here?” Ms Warren called them forward, doing a quick headcount. “Alright, say hello to Ms Bates and Mr Rodriguez, they are here as our security escort. I'd also like a round of applause for our tour guide, Miss Eleonora!”

 

"Oh, just Ellie, please!" the tour guide insisted, as they clapped enthusiastically. She had one of those immediately likeable faces. "Hello, Midtown Tech! We'll start our tour in five minutes. I'd recommend you all use the restrooms before we begin, if you haven't already."

 

Mr Rodriguez handed out lanyards and ID cards with their photos, names and VISITOR printed on them. Peter wore his immediately, fascinated. He hadn’t been given one of these for the Compound, he’d just walked right in. If he’d been given an ID, Peter mused, it would have been lost two backpacks ago.

 

“Hey Peter,” Cindy piped up from beside him. “How come you don’t have your own ID?”

 

Flash didn’t say anything, but Peter could see him smirking.

 

 _Because my Stark Internship is code for superhero-ing,_ Peter thought. _Huh, that kinda does work as a verb._ “I’ve never been to this building,” he said out loud. “I tend to go to the Compound.”

 

“Avengers Compound? Isn’t that way too far?” Jamie asked, puzzled. “How do you go there on school nights?”

 

Peter was saved from answering by Mr Rodriguez, who was now handing out wireless earbuds that allowed them to hear what Ellie was saying into her microphone. Peter had used corded versions of these in Berlin, which were attached to a bulky radio handset. He was glad Stark Tower had better tech, those handsets had really ruined many of his pictures.

 

He shrugged at Jamie, wore his earbuds, and avoided everyone’s eyes.

  
____

 

  
“Welcome to Stark Tower Complex, the New York Headquarters of Stark Industries. This fully self-sustaining complex consists of Stark Tower and well as the North and South Buildings flanking it on either side, all of which are fully powered by SI’s patented ARC Reactor technology. Completed in May 2012, the main tower has 93 floors above ground. It sustained significant damage and underwent subsequent remodelling after the Battle of New York against the alien Chitauri race – fortunately, it was unoccupied at the time. It was then temporarily renamed as Avengers Tower and served as their primary residence. After what happened with Ultron, the Avengers were relocated upstate to the Compound, and Stark Tower regained its previous name. The Avengers residences and training areas have been kept empty but are not available for public viewing as of now.

 

“The three buildings serve mainly as office and laboratory spaces for SI and its subsidiaries. The South Building also has the Stark Library, which is open to the public. On our tour today we will visit Stark Industries museum, the clean energy exhibit and some of the technology labs. If we have time we may be able to squeeze in the Avengers exhibit, which isn’t really relevant to you, but is quite exciting! We’ll end our tour at the gift shop, all profits from which go to charities across the city.”

 

Ellie led the class through another security gate, where they could scan their new ID’s like SI employees did. “Since you’re visitors you don’t really need to do this,” she explained, demonstrating with her own ID. “Your badges are connected to mine for the duration of the tour. However, if any of you become part of our company in the future, this is how you’ll sign in and out, even if you leave for lunch break. They're very strict about that.” Despite it being quite a mundane procedure, Peter noticed that nearly everyone in his class scanned their ID as if it was groundbreaking technology.

 

Flash was up in the front now. "Hey Ellie," he smiled winningly, "do you know the people that work here, like interns and stuff?” A few people turned to look at Peter.

 

“I don't know nearly as many people as I should,” Ellie admitted. “There’s thousands of people going in and out of here, so unless they're fellow tour guides or part of the security team, I don’t end up interacting with them. I've had some interns shadow me, though.”

 

“And what do interns tend to do here?” Flash persisted. “Is it mostly stuff like getting coffee?”

 

Ellie laughed. “No, not at all! We’ve got bots for that. Why, are you interested in applying for an internship at SI? How wonderful! We’re going paperless so you’ll have to apply online, but I can give you the link,” she offered. “You can't start until you finish school, or turn 18 – whichever comes first. Company policy.”

 

“Is that right,” Flash said slowly, turning back and raising his eyebrows at Peter, who clearly didn't qualify under either category. 

 

 _I am the bigger person. I don’t need validation from someone who named himself_ Flash _,_ Peter chanted to himself, looking away.

 

They walked through a long corridor which had holo screens of important SI scientists and engineers beaming at them on either side. Ellie pointed out some notable people such as the lead architect of the tower who was now a leading name in sustainable design, the augmented reality expert who had recently been on the news, and the prodigy who had designed Colonel Rhodes' leg braces and was now head of the Prosthetics division.

 

“I’ve noticed that everyone’s badge looks the same,” Ms Warren remarked. “There isn’t any designation or further information?”

 

“There isn’t any external identification for safety reasons,” said Ellie. “Just name and department.” She showed hers to Ms Warren and those huddled around her. Peter couldn’t see what it said. “The QR codes allow more general access, and there’s biometric checks for private labs or high-level conference rooms. We used to have designations and colour codes on our ID's according to seniority but now it's all about horizontal organisation, everyone is equally valuable and all that." The teacher looked at her dubiously, and Ellie rolled her eyes in agreement. "I know, no one really believes it, but what can you do? They're trying to get everyone to call each other by their first names, too. Can you imagine calling Miss Potts 'Pepper'? I could never!”

 

"What is up with everyone who works here being hot?!" Peter heard a girl whisper.

 

“So I read there’s an AI that runs the building?” Betty asked.

 

“Indeed there is, she's called FRIDAY, like Girl Friday, you know? It's quite amazing, working here. Everything’s a bit more glamorous at SI, because of Mr Stark and, well, everything around him. We got Neil Degrasse Tyson around just two days ago, can you believe that? Some employees here are minor celebrities too. Like Happy Hogan is our head of security, people tend to know him because of the whole…”

 

At this, Ned elbowed Peter, who grinned back. Happy was his manager! Peter was an Asset! Well, Spider-Man was, but still!

 

“–Killian,” Ellie was saying, “yes, that one. He’s all better now, though. Oh look, here’s Tina Han, our head of Public Relations.” She nodded deferentially to a tall woman in a smart suit, who was approaching them at speed with an assistant who was taking down her rapid fire instructions on his StarkPad.

 

She smiled at them as she walked by. “Welcome to Stark Tower. Have a great tour!”

  
__

 

  
Peter could tell that even the ones who had believed him before about the internship, didn’t any more. He had never been to the tower, he didn’t seem to know much about the place or any of the people, and he’d heard Lucas whisper to Marie that maybe Flash was right after all, Tony Stark would never let his intern walk around with _that_ cellphone. Flash himself was using previously unseen discretion, and had only called Peter ‘Penis’ twice, both times out of Ms Warren’s earshot.

 

Name-calling aside, the field trip was going quite well. Peter had watched a fascinating video about SI’s clean energy efforts, and as STEM students they’d been shown basic schematics and information on ARC reactor technology that wasn’t easily available in the public domain. He’d seen how Mr Stark’s dad had laid the foundation for SI, and how Mr Stark had moved away from his legacy. He’d been so young when Mr Stark had announced that he was shutting down the weapons division, but seeing that video again today had reminded him of sitting with his parents and Ben and May, watching the news report that Tony Stark was alive and well.

 

Peter sometimes forgot how he’d idolised Mr Stark, even before Iron Man. What would Peter be, without Tony Stark? Would he even exist, or would he have been nuked along with the rest of New York in 2012? _People always got it wrong,_ Peter mused. _Tony Stark is the real hero, not Iron Man._

 

An alarm rang out in the distance. The lights flashed once, making some students shout in distress.

 

“Please follow the path marked on the floor,” a voice spoke from around them. It was the same voice as Mr Stark’s suit. Peter assumed this was FRIDAY.

 

Everyone spoke at once, asking the security guards and Ellie what was going on. All three said the same things as they led them down the corridor: they were to keep calm, it was a minor issue, and they were safe.

 

Peter was slowly moving outwards to sneak away when Ms Warren turned around caught his eye and glared. Ms Bates laid a hand upon his shoulder in warning.

 

“Stay with the group.”

 

Peter took his phone out and texted Happy. **Hey Happy I’m in Stark Tower what’s going on can I help**

 

Their group was taken to a room with water and snacks and told to be seated until given the all clear. There was another group with them in there, and Ellie and the other guide started to tell anecdotes about working at the tower to calm the visitors down. The security team, now consisting of four members, kept one eye on the doors and one on the crowd, ensuring that everyone was accounted for.

 

“This is like that episode in Modern Family,” Rico whispered to Alyson. “Where Phil says to look at the air hostess when there’s turbulence, and if she’s smiling and still serving, you’re okay.”

 

“That’s sexist,” Alyson whispered back, although she didn’t sound sure. “And they’re called stewardesses, I think.”

 

Peter checked his phone. Happy had replied, **Keep your head down, nothing you can do. Almost sorted.**

 

Sure enough, they were cleared to leave in a couple of minutes and Ellie led the way towards the labs. “Okay, let’s try something exciting now. To enter the bio labs, you have to go through an sanitation airlock, should we go there first?”

 

____

 

  
After visiting Actual Bruce Banner’s old labs(!!!), they had made their way through robotics (where they met DUM-E, Mr Stark’s first robot), prosthetics and commercial technology.

 

As they were fiddling with the earlier StarkPhone prototypes and trying to hack into the code (in Ned’s case, succeeding), Flash rolled his chair over to Peter.

 

“This must suck, eh, Parker?” he gloated, making sure to keep his voice low to avoid Ms Warren’s wrath. “You could’ve come clean when I gave you the chance, but now you’re losing face and honestly, I'm feeling secondhand embarrassment–”

 

“Get lost, Flash,” Ned interrupted, bringing his prototype to show Peter. “Peter doesn’t have to explain himself to you.” He pushed Flash’s chair away, and Flash yelped as he almost rolled into another group.

 

Peter felt a sudden panic rising, which he’d started calling his Spidey Sense in his mind. He stood up.

 

“I’m feeling Millennial Anxiety,” he hissed at Ned, who realised it was code for something (due to Peter’s previous passionate rants about gen-Z being mislabelled as millennials) but didn’t create an instant distraction as Peter had hoped.

 

Another alarm sounded, this time closer. The lights flashed twice, and the security team started bringing the group back together.

 

“What’s wrong?” Ned whispered, as they joined the back of the line.

 

Peter shook his head. He was all too aware of Ms Warren right behind him. “Too late.”

 

“Please follow the path marked on the floor,” came FRIDAY’s voice again, as the floor displayed a pathway in neon arrows.

 

**Happy what’s going on??**

 

They made their way out of the door and towards the lobby. Ellie pressed a button to call an elevator, but nothing happened.

 

“Public elevators are currently disabled. Please make your way to the nearest safe room.”

 

A hidden electronic door opened to Peter’s left, startling the class and revealing what seemed like a really small panic room. The security guards seemed worried and Peter could hear Rico muttering to Alyson about turbulence.

 

As they were ushered inside, Peter could hear Happy’s voice coming out of the speakers.

 

“Kid, you there? Peter?”

 

Peter squeezed through the crowd towards the speaker. “Happy, yeah, I’m here. What’s going on?” Peter looked around at his frightened class. “We’re kinda all freaking out.”

 

“It’s nothing for you to worry about, kid,” Happy reassured him. “It’s just too close to your location and I don’t like it. Is your class all in?”

 

“Yeah, we’re all in.” As Peter said the words, the door shut and they moved upwards. It was an elevator, Peter realised, feeling foolish. Even though it was large enough to contain maybe forty people, Peter’s classmates all had backpacks, so they were a tight fit. He felt a bit claustrophobic.

 

“Stay calm, okay?" Happy was saying. "Don’t leave your group, _no matter what,_ you get me? Bates, Rodriguez, watch him.”

 

“Why does everyone–” Peter began, but he could tell Happy had disconnected. He decided to read into the instructions as Happy putting him in charge of his classmates' safety.

 

“What’s going on?” everyone wanted to know.

 

“Who’s Happy?”

 

“You don’t know Happy Hogan?” another student replied incredulously. “He has his own update accounts on Twitter!”

 

“Do you know where we’re going?”

 

“Wait, you seriously work here?”

 

“Do you know Tony Stark?”

 

“Yeah, can we meet Tony Stark?”

 

“Ugh, move your elbows!”

 

Peter just shook his head, breathing deeply. He was itching to help but had no information, no way to leave, and no suit.

 

“This is just a routine procedure, folks,” Mr Rodriguez said loudly, ignoring the clamouring of the students. His height advantage was even greater in this small space. “Your safety is our priority and our Head of Security has taken care of it himself.”

 

The doors opened and they were rushed out, Peter right up front. Ten feet away, another set of doors blocked their entry, making the class huddle behind him. To the right, a screen flashed once, and Peter made his way towards it.

 

“Please place your right hand on the screen and speak your name,” the first voice guided. Peter did as instructed, and the doors opened. “Welcome, Ferris Bueller. Please stay in this room until the issue is resolved. You are safe here.”

  
  
“Thanks,” Peter replied quietly as the class shuffled inside. “Um, are you FRIDAY?”

 

“Yes,” the voice – FRIDAY – replied. Her voice reminded him of Saoirse Ronan. “I’m glad to meet you, Peter. Karen speaks fondly of you.”

 

“Yeah, you too!” Peter smiled, flushing slightly as Ms Bates took his arm and pulled him into the room.

 

Ellie and the security guards had clearly been trained for these circumstances. They barely batted an eye at the fact that the private elevator had taken them to what was definitely a living area. Ellie helped get Peter’s class seated (half on couches, some on the floor, some brought barstools from the kitchen island), and found the bathrooms. A massive television had somehow turned on and was playing music videos, filling the large area with the sound of Imagine Dragons singing Radioactive (FRIDAY sure had a sense of humour). Mr Rodriguez was speaking to someone on his phone, monitoring the room. Ms Warren and Ms Bates stayed by the doors, talking quietly and glancing occasionally at Peter.

 

Peter moved away from the group and went towards the full length windows, getting his phone out and calling Mr Stark.

 

Mr Stark answered immediately. “Hey kid, what’s up?” he asked. He sounded distracted.

 

“Hey Mr Stark, hope I’m not bothering you,” Peter apologised, keeping his voice low. “It’s just that I’m on a field trip to the tower and Happy sent me to this place in a private elevator?”

 

“Uhhhh, no idea what’s happening, I'm in Malibu. Let me–“ Mr Stark replied. “I'm sure it's another bot on the loose...yup, this one's got a flamethrower. Nothing for you to do, my people are trained for this. Wait, where did you say Happy sent you?”

 

Peter’s shoulders dropped in relief. Ned had come up to him and was heartened by Peter’s reaction. “I don’t really know? I didn’t see a floor number, but it recognised my handprint. It called me Ferris Bueller?”

 

“Yeah, haven't you seen that _really old_ movie?” Mr Stark snarked. “So you must be in one of the old Avengers’ rooms, kid. Hey, do you know Harry Osborn?”

 

“Yeah, everyone knows him,” Peter replied, rolling his eyes. Harry Osborn was possibly one of the most spoiled people Peter knew of. His dad was Norman Osborn, who had newly taken over Oscorp after the company’s illegal and dangerous animal experimentation had been exposed, forcing Amberson (Harry’s grandfather) to go underground. Harry’s mother was a Venezuelan supermodel who had left Norman for being an addict and philanderer, and taken full custody of Harry. The drawn out divorce proceedings had garnered huge support for Norman, especially after his public breakdown and subsequent championing for mental wellness and sobriety. After resurfacing with an image overhaul, Norman was now a media darling, and 16-year-old Harry was one of the most influential teens on social media. “Why?”

 

“Well, I was recently reminded that I’m his godfather,“ Mr Stark responded, making Peter glad he’d kept his opinion to himself. “Must’ve been drunk when I accepted, let’s face it – and he’s moving back to New York with his father. Norman reached out, we mended fences etcetera, and he asked me to, I dunno, hang out with Harry. I don’t know how to connect with him, okay? Will you come? You can be friends.”

 

“What, like a playdate?” Peter laughed. “He’s not exactly short of friends Mr Stark, I’ve seen his Instagram.”

 

“All lies," Tony dismissed. "Look, I don’t think he’s doing that well, being here. Businessmen aren't the best dads so I’d feel better if he had someone like you around. One sec.” Peter could hear several flashbulbs going off in the background, and then a car door shutting. “Rhodey was there for me when I was this age, okay? He was my rock in all the chaos.”

 

“Right, I get that.”

 

“So you free on Saturday?”

 

“Yeah, I’m free, but–”

 

“Great, I'll text you. Keep your nose clean."

 

"Yeah, okay," Peter replied, recognising the dismissal. He disconnected the call.

 

“Hey, where do you think we are? Are these the old Avengers’ quarters?” Ned asked from behind him. Peter turned around and found most of his classmates staring, many of them typing or filming on their phones. Ned waved his hand to get Peter’s attention back. 

 

“Yeah, Mr Stark says they are,” Peter replied, taking in the decor. The living room was well furnished but otherwise unremarkable. There was an open plan kitchen opposite him. He could see doors leading to what Peter assumed were bedrooms. There was the bathroom Ellie had found. There was a sparsely filled bookshelf. “Can you tell whose?”

 

“There’s like, no personality here,” Ned frowned. “Maybe the Black Widow? She won’t give anything away, you know? Or Hawkeye, he’s a spy too.”

 

“Or Cap,” MJ said from Peter’s other side. Where had she come from? “He didn’t really live here, right?”

 

“No, he definitely did,” Ned replied. “They all did. Around Ultron time, remember? There were photos of him in his room here.”

 

They stood in silence through two more songs. Peter’s mind was racing through the memories of Ultron and the sheer panic and devastation that had occurred. _Ultron was what broke up the Avengers,_ he thought bitterly. _Stupid Sokovia. Stupid Accords._ Peter was terrified of the Accords. They made sense when you thought of them distantly, but Peter had read up on them after the fight with Captain America, and was glad for once that he was legally a minor. He kept having recurring nightmares where he was ordered by faceless men in suits to go on a rescue mission, but it turned out that he was being asked to steal vibranium from Wakanda. He didn’t want to go to third world countries and attack innocent, defenceless people! Although, their new King didn’t seem all that defenceless in Germany, what with that cool suit and all. Peter made a note to ask Mr Stark about it. Had he made that suit too?

 

“Maybe they just emptied the rooms during the move,” Ned suggested. “The Avengers must need their stuff, right?”

 

Peter blinked, nodding.

 

__

 

 

After what seemed like hours but was probably just twenty minutes, the doors opened again. Happy entered, joined by more security personnel. Ms Bates and Mr Rodriguez immediately went to him, but Happy looked around wildly, calming down when he found Peter. He rushed to Peter’s side. “You good, kid?”

 

“Yeah, Happy, I’m okay. Did they contain the bot?”

 

“What are you talking about?” Happy frowned. “Doesn’t matter, let’s get you guys out of here, today’s a bad day,” he continued, taking Peter’s arm and dragging him towards the guards. He gave coded instructions to the team, which split up and started dividing the group. Half of them were taken first, including a protesting Ms Warren. Peter, MJ and Ned stayed behind with Happy and the remaining class.

 

“Mr Stark lied to me?” Peter asked, aghast. “He said it was a routine escaped bot!”

 

“Occupational hazard. Get used to it, buddy,” Happy replied, reluctantly allowing Peter’s classmates to take selfies with him. “Okay, get in, folks, let’s go.”

 

“Hey Mr Happy,” Ned greeted, getting into the elevator and standing on Peter’s other side. “What floor are we on? The view is amazing!”

 

Peter didn’t even remember the view, and he regretted it now. He should have taken pictures for May.

 

“90th. Hey Pete, you want it?”

 

Peter stared, along with his classmates. “What, like, a room?”

 

“You can take the whole floor, actually. Used to be Thor’s, but he’s gone off the grid so it's empty. It used to be Cap’s before that, but this has a balcony, and Thor kept flying in and breaking the windows on his floor, so they switched.” Misunderstanding Peter’s dropped jaw, he shrugged. “It’s fine, Steve didn’t mind. If Thor does come back though, we’ll have to figure out an agreement.”

 

“This is the coolest thing I’ve ever heard in my life,” Ned said, in awe. "Peter's gonna be roommates with THOR!"

 

“Hey, knock it out!" Happy shouted when everyone spoke all at once. "FRIDAY, lobby please."

 

There was uncomfortable silence as the elevator began its descent.

 

"Just between us,” Happy continued, lowering his voice, “Tony was sad you didn’t accept his offer to live at the Compound. He likes having people around. Anyway, talk to your Aunt May, do what you want with it.” He looked at Ned and MJ, and nodded indulgently. “Bring your little friends, too.”

 

Ned swore loudly, breaking the tension and making everyone laugh.

 

“Can we have a party, Mr Hogan?” someone pleaded.

 

“No parties!” Happy scowled, eliciting a collective “awww” from Peter’s classmates.

 

As they were loaded back into the bus, Peter accepted fist bumps and shoulder pats in a daze. It felt nice to be considered cool as just regular Peter Parker. Would've been nicer if Liz was here, though.

 

___

 

  
Peter had been swarmed in the bus, but their teacher had threatened detention to anyone who bothered him. So instead, people just gossiped behind his back over the next few weeks.

 

“So what’s the deal, you think?” Sally asked Betty quietly, twirling her hair around her finger. “Is Parker some kind of secret genius?”

 

Betty rolled her eyes. “Doesn’t seem that smart. He’s kind of a loser, kept staring at poor Liz when she was here, remember?”

 

__

 

  
“I heard that kid Peter Parker is Tony Stark’s secret child,” a freshman boy was telling a girl in the hallway.

 

The girl looked dubious. “Really? Doesn’t look like him at all!”

 

“They both have brown eyes and brown hair,” the boy offered.

 

“That’s so generic!”

 

“Well, not to be mean but Peter looks a bit generic, right?”

 

Appalled, Peter couldn’t contain himself. “HEY!”

 

“What?” The boy asked, without remorse.

 

__

 

  
Flash confronted him by the lockers. “Do you really know Spider-Man?”

 

“Yeah, I really do,” Peter replied, smirking.

 

“Did he, uh, say anything about me?” Flash asked nervously. “I let him borrow my car on Homecoming.”

 

“Is that right,” Peter grinned, echoing Flash’s words from the field trip. “Not what I heard!”

  
__

  
“Is that guy Happy dating your aunt?” Cindy asked him during Decathlon practice.

 

“Nope.”

 

“Is Stark your sugar daddy?” MJ deadpanned.

 

“NO! GROSS!” Peter shuddered. “Why would you even say that?!”

 

“Don’t underestimate yourself, Peter. You’re a solid 5,” she snorted.

 

“He’s like my dad!” Peter hissed at her.

 

“Don’t let anyone hear you say that!” MJ replied, moving away as Mr Warrington returned. “Rumours fly around here.”

  
__

 

  
“Shouldn’t Peter Parker and Harry Osborn’s date be in the announcements?” Betty was asking Principal Morita two weeks later.

 

“No, Miss Brant, private lives of students should not be on the news.”

 

“But this is public interest!” Betty protested, following the Principal into his office.

 

“It wasn’t–” Peter protested, to no one in particular.

 

__

 

  
“Peter’s been secretly dating Harry Osborn for months,” the same freshman boy from before was telling a different girl in the hallway. “That’s how Tony Stark knows him, Harry introduced them.”

 

“Didn’t Harry Osborn just move here?”

 

“Yeah, but Peter’s parents were Oscorp scientists back in the day, so they're childhood friends.”

 

“And you know this, how?”

 

“Peter and I are totally bros!”

  
__

 

  
“Maybe Peter’s being recruited for the Avengers,” Abraham joked during break, making Peter’s heart stop.

 

Everyone laughed, Flash loudest of them all.

 

__

 

  
“He’s secret services, I just know it,” Peter heard Jason say to a group gathered around him. “They recruit really young, right? What else would explain the sudden disappearances, the high connections–“

 

“Oh my god, he started dating Liz and suddenly her dad goes to prison? He was using her to spy on her dad!”

 

“Exactly,” agreed Jason, nodding wisely. “Ned Leeds is probably part of it too. It’s like some 21 Jump Street situation, except they’re both Jonah Hill.”

 

“Hey, no, Parker’s got really fit though!” Noah interjected. “What? I’m allowed to find him cute! Harry Osborn does too!”

 

“There’s NO proof they’re dating,” Sally scoffed. “Harry’s straight by all accounts.”

 

“What, you mean update accounts? You’re such a stalker!”

 

“Parker!” Jason called out, finally noticing him. “Hey Parker, are you dating Harry Osborn?”

 

Peter feigned deafness and hurried to class.

 

“See,” he heard Noah say triumphantly, “he isn’t denying it!”

  
__

 

  
“Do you think I can ask him about the spiders?” Ned wanted to know, as Mr Harrington announced their next field trip, this time to the MoMA.

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Harry. I’ll wait a few weeks until he knows me better, and then I can ask him about the radioactive spiders!”

 

“Ned, no!”

 

“I’m just saying,” Ned shook his head. “Why not crustaceans? Did you know lobsters are basically immortal?”

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Tried to make this less indulgent but couldn't quite manage, I started off saying that he'd have a totally boring, normal field trip with no Avengers. It...got away from me.
> 
> A few nods to the comics/other Spider-Man movies in there, with Spider-Man's nemeses like Doctor Octopus, Rhino and Scorpion, as well as the Osborns. I really want the MCU to avoid the Green Goblin storyline but I also want Harry Osborn so *shrug*. 
> 
> Radioactive by Imagine Dragons was apparently intended for the doomed Spider-Man musical (or so people say) but in here the joke is just about the spider that bit Peter.
> 
> The Ferris Bueller joke is inspired from the hilarious quinjet scene in Thor Ragnarok. https://youtu.be/-qCNUex6rRc?t=35s
> 
> You're welcome to ignore the Infinity War references (Peter's watch/wristband thingy, spaceships, aliens, wizards, the MoMA field trip) if you want. Poor Peter, forever destined for disastrous field trips :(
> 
> And lastly, this wasn't betaed, so apologies for errors in spelling or grammar!


End file.
